Lessons in Love and Loss: The Legacy of My Beagle Named Cody

My 14-year-old beagle, Cody, died suddenly in my arms on a cold metal table in the back office of a veterinary clinic. I had driven two hours to Columbia, SC, where he was visiting my son in college. A frantic call from my son a few days prior had signaled the urgent trip, and upon arrival, Cody looked drastically different from the vibrant pet I had seen six weeks prior at Christmas.

I had naively thought I was prepared for his passing, especially since he was nearing 15 and had shown no signs of slowing down at our last meeting. The vet gave me a few final moments alone with him, his heart slowing to thirty-four beats per minute. Overwhelmed, I found myself sobbing, gently rubbing his velvety ears and soft, scruffy neck, reminiscing about our lives together.

In those moments, a particular memory surfaced: the day we brought Cody home. My son, merely eight years old at the time, was filled with a mix of disbelief and joy, repeatedly asking, "Is he really ours?" That day, our family had expanded with an unspoken promise of shared adventures and countless memories. Cody's eager eyes and wagging tail had sealed an unbreakable bond, one that had enriched our lives beyond measure.

As Cody's journey with us came to an end, it wasn't just his life that flashed before my eyes, but the entirety of our shared experiences. This dog, the epitome of a happy, hungry, and pack-loving beagle, had been more than a pet; he was a central part of our family's tapestry.

Leaving the clinic without him, I was engulfed by a profound sadness, one that extended beyond the immediate loss. It was a reflection on the countless times I had hurried out the door, too preoccupied to cherish the moments with Cody, who was always eager for my attention. It dawned on me that the depth of my sorrow was tied to these missed opportunities for connection, moments when love was available, but I chose haste over heart.

This realization brought me to a broader contemplation about love and vulnerability. In the face of emotional pain, it's tempting to close off our hearts, to vow never to expose ourselves to such depths of sorrow again. Yet, in doing so, we deny ourselves the essence of living fully. Cody's passing reminded me that the pain of loss is inextricably linked to the capacity to love and be loved.

So, on this Valentine's Day, I extend a gentle reminder to embrace love in all its forms. Tell those important to you that they are loved, not just today but every day. And for those who have built walls around their hearts, consider this an invitation to dismantle them, piece by piece. Love, in its purest form, is worth the risk of heartache.

As I reflect on my time with Cody, I am reminded that while the pain of loss is inevitable, the joy of love is irreplaceable. May we all have the courage to keep our hearts open, to love and be loved, without reservation. My love goes out to each and every one of you, wherever you may be today.

Is Fear of Flying Grounding Your Chances of Success?

For many people, fear of flying is a problem, especially around the holidays. Some know the reason for their fears yet, others share that the fear seemed to come on over night even after years of flying without anxiety.

Over time, a fear of flying can restrict your career, social life and happiness. Work projects and family events may make flying necessary.

Even though 40 percent of passengers report fear of being involved in a plane crash, According to a 2015 report in The Economist, your chance of dying in one is roughly one in 5.4 million!  By comparison, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the individual American driver’s odds of dying as a result of an injury sustained in an automobile crash (which include pedestrians, bicyclists and motorcyclists involved in car crashes) come out to about 1 in 77 — making it one of the highest-probability causes of death tracked by the CDC.

By contrast, heart disease, the leading cause of death, kills 1 in 4 people, alcohol and drugs kill 1 in 34. 

Unfortunately, rational statistics seldom make a difference for phobias. From a fear of public speaking to flying, our phobias are rarely rational.

Can You Conquer a Fear of Flying?

While it may seem impossible, you can enjoy a calm flight. I have helped many people recover from their flying phobias through hypnotherapy.

“Rebecca, I would like to thank you for everything. With as bad as I was not wanting to fly, with your Hypnosis I had no fear at all. Just like you said. It made it that I could have a wonderful time traveling and not the fear to hold me back. I would recommend you to anyone. Thank you for giving me that back. Plus Italy is awesome. Thanks again.

— — Robert Leonard, Project Superintendent, Mississippi

Sedatives may help but for many it is still extremely stressful during the days and hours leading up to taking the meds and getting on the flight.  Furthermore, medication is masking the fear NOT resolving it.

Like any phobia, a fear of flying is rooted in your subconscious. You may have had a traumatic experience or watched a plane crash. Some of my clients discover that their fear of flying is rooted in a non-related incident that somehow gets connected to flying, for example, like a terrifying experience riding rollercoasters as a child.  Most of the time my clients had no conscious awareness of the root cause of their fears and phobias but with hypnosis, they are able to quickly identify the root cause.

Whatever the cause, even if it is irrational, your subconscious mind has created the fear trying to protect you. It associates flying with danger. Thus, the fear is created to keep you away from flying.

How I Overcame My Fear of Flying

Personally, I used hypnosis to overcome a paralyzing fear of flying.  My fear was triggered by one of the most prominent events in airline history.  I was scheduled to be on American Airlines Flight #77 that crashed into the Pentagon on 9/11/2001.

American Airlines Flight 77 was a scheduled American Airlines domestic transcontinental passenger flight from Washington Dulles International Airport in Dulles, Virginia, to Los Angeles International Airport in Los Angeles, California.  I would have been seven months pregnant with my son and traveling with one year old daughter.

Like many other people have reported after the 09/11 incident, I had a strong intuition that told me to not only change my flight but change the date AND the airport from which I was flying. 

On the day of the tragedy, I believe I went into some kind of shock as the full realization came to me that I was scheduled to be on one of the downed planes.  I was terrified to fly.  When I did fly, I was paranoid about the passengers on the plane.  I would break out into a sweat.  My heart would race and I felt claustrophobic. 

Using some of my own hypnosis techniques on myself, in less than a month, I was flying comfortably again.  This is typically a three step process that I have used for years to help thousands of clients suffering from all types of fears and phobias.

Hypnosis Helps Overcome Fear of Flying

Hypnosis is a highly effective way to feel comfortable while flying. To conquer your fear, you must address it. Hypnosis helps you to identify and clear what triggers that fear in your subconscious. Hypnosis helps to re-message the mind so that you are no longer afraid. As a result, you can escape from the panic and fear associated with it.

Most of my clients are flying comfortably in one to two sessions! If you would like to get help overcoming a fear of phobia, reach out. Virtual sessions work perfectly for this problem. I can help you from the comfort of your own home or office.

Rebecca's Workshop Featured in Firefly Sisterhood

Firely Sisterhood has written an article which features her work with breast cancer survivors.  Rebecca is the creator of "The Mermaid's Journey" an empowerment workshop series specifically created for breast cancer victims as part of a rejuvenation experience sponsored by Send Me On Vacation, a non-profit organization.

What is it about mermaids that has us mesmerized?

Their long, undulating tails as they glide effortlessly through the water? Their gorgeous hair and beautiful voices? The mythology, legends, and lore that surround them? Whatever it is, mermaids have captured our attention in books, movies, TV shows, and even making appearances at our very own Minnesota Renaissance Festival!

For a woman who has experienced a breast cancer diagnosis and treatment, a mermaid may be the absolute LAST possible thing she would compare herself to....

Checkout full article here...

Empowering Women to Empower Themselves

The following is a guest contributor:  Jennifer Nelson, Breast Cancer Survivor from Port St. Lucie, FL.  She is a recipient of The Mermaid's Journey Empowerment Vacation.

"Eight a.m. meetings for breast cancer survivors on a cruise? Are they serious?" I thought to myself.  I was not looking forward to this experience. On the first day, I did not know what to expect. Was she going to hypnotize me? When the sessions started, the first thing I noticed is that Rebecca Shaw made me feel safe to share my feelings about surviving breast cancer. She transformed my mind from thinking as a dying fish caught on a hook to feeling like a mermaid gliding through the waters of a tropical island…and it was through conversation about our lives!

In only three half day workshop sessions, I learned to meditate for ten minutes a day. I realized this did not replace my prayer time. It is time spent visualizing and focusing on positive thoughts. One of the mindfulness techniques Rebecca taught me was how to place a light around me that when negativity is around me, it bounces right off of that light. I can now send back positive energy. I know it works because as soon as I got back home from the cruise, a friend of mine was complaining and speaking negatively. I told him I cannot have this type of stress and if it continued, he would have to leave. He left. However, early the next morning, he apologized to me and then I asked the golden question I was taught to ask instead of giving advice, "What are you going to do?” He reached a solution on his own. It was a winning match due to Coach Shaw!

The workshop also helped me to overcome fears. For example, I had a fear of swimming in deep water. One day on the cruise, Rebecca, my roommate and I went snorkeling. I was nervous but they convinced me that I could do it. I went way out from the land into the middle of the ocean. However, for some reason, I started panicking and started screaming for help as I drank salt water. Rebecca calmly came over to me. She spoke soothing words as they sent a boat to get me. I don’t think I would have made it without her. She obviously lives what she teaches. Peaceful, calm thinking can save us from sinking in life!

Overall, this trip and the seminars changed my life. I now feel empowered! When we were transformed to look like mermaids on the island, the positive conversations and visualization of my mermaid we discussed helped me to glow during my photo shoot.

Thank you for helping me recognize my inner and outer beauty Rebecca Taylor Shaw.

By the end of the trip, I was running to each seminar. I think I was the first person there everyday. I wish I could take Rebecca home with me! However, in three days, she left us with enough tools to make it and survive in any situation, especially in battling breast cancer. Rebecca’s last words to us were to affirm daily… "I am awesome, I am blessed, I am an overcomer, and I am grateful!" That is what I am! Thanks to Send Me On Vacation and Rebecca Taylor Shaw!

Empowering Yourself to Get Unstuck!

It's actually not that hard to create a life that's really flowing, full of love and energy.

At one point, my life used to be a real struggle. I had inherited that "farmer" mentality from my parents and grandparents who grew up on dairy farms in the South. I believed that if I wanted to achieve anything of real value, I had to work hard and struggle for it. I'd get upset when things weren't the way I thought they were supposed to be.  I'd get down on myself if I wasn't pushing, pushing, pushing to get ahead.

I know now that life doesn't have to feel this way. And it's actually pretty easy to turn things around. All it requires is willingness. The willingness to look at your thoughts and beliefs and a willingness to admit when they aren't supporting you in greater levels of peace and happiness.

When I developed a debilitating bout of chronic fatigue when my children were toddlers, I had to give up the struggle.  I had to stop beating myself up and feeling guilty for not being Super-Mom, do it all, successful biz owner.  I got humbled and I had to let people help me. 

I had to draw stronger boundaries with my time and my commitments.  I had to even take things off my plate that I enjoyed when my body told me to rest. 

What was most infuriating is that the doctor told me, “We don’t really know what causes chronic fatigue.  Frankly, there’s no cure for it.”  It's the most obvious, logical thing in the world when a doctor tells you, there's no cure your illness to believe it. I felt stuck.

The turning point in healing from my chronic fatigue came with two MINDSET breakthroughs.

First, this "good" girl got defiant! 

Which meant I refused to believe that I was stuck with the chronic fatigue - mystery illness!  I kept affirming to myself, "I am drawing to me, the people and circumstances that I need to get healthy and well again." 

Let’s be clear.  This is not a DOING, PUSHING, STRUGGLING action. In fact, it is the opposite.  It’s a MAGNETIC pull using the power of the creative mind to draw to me what I need by visualizing the intended outcome and allowing my subconscious mind to work on the solutions while my conscious mind is busy doing other things. 

Second, the solution to healing was not a body thing.  It was a mind, body, spirit thing!  So I changed my sleep patterns.  Then, I used hypnosis to clear the stressful emotions and wounded spirit that were connected to my dis-ease. 

These two mindset shifts were the lynchpin.  Draw to you your solution.  Address the problem on all levels of body and mind.

Next time, you notice yourself feeling overwhelmed.  Ask yourself, what am pushing for or against?  Must you struggle?  Or can you shift your mindset to support you in success with more grace and ease?

Try it.

1)  REFUSE TO BELIEVE YOU ARE STUCK!  Because the minute you do that, you will stop looking for solutions and your subconscious mind which is a wealth of information and resources far beyond the conscious mind will stop as well.  Just tell yourself, "I don't know the solution at the moment, but I will find it or I will meet someone who can help." Or use the affirmation I used above.  Your subconscious is far more resourceful than you can imagine, it works on solutions in the background while your conscious mind is busy doing other things.  That's why a name you've forgotten will pop in later or long after the test is over, you recall the information you thought you had forgotten.  If you come to rely on this ability to use your subconscious for problem solving, it will enhance and become a source of confidence and wisdom for you.

2)  OPEN YOUR MIND TO SEE ALL ASPECTS OF A PROBLEM.   Many times when you are stuck, it is because you are not addressing your problem from a whole brain perspective. Put bluntly, sometimes analysis and logic is not enough.  Oftentimes, there are hidden factors contributing to a problem whether they be emotional, unconscious, hidden mindsets or belief patterns.   If you have a health issue, consider if stressful emotions are playing into the illness or disease.  Also consider the possibility that the illness provides a payoff or gain for you on deeper hidden level. I worked with a client who had migraines for years.  Through hypnotherapy, she discovered that they served the purpose of giving her an excuse to stay home from work, a job that she had grown to hate.  Once she became conscious of this, she chose to quit her job!  No more migraines. 

Years ago, I quit engineering to make it my mission to help anyone who feels stuck.  If I can help you, I would be honored to do so.

Meanwhile, sending you much light and love.  The world needs your unique talents and light.  You are meant to #makeadifference

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3 Reasons You Should Take More Vacation Time

Grand Mayan Pools at Riviera Maya, Mexico - Empowerment Retreats

I decided last year that I was committing myself to more vacation days.  And can I tell you how HARD that was for me?  Way more than you would probably guess as I am not one who likes to be in debt.  

Owning a business where I provide services has always meant, when I don’t work, I don’t get paid.  So vacations were always something to really think twice about.  Interestingly, according to two separate surveys by Forbes and a national market research firm, even most Americans who are given paid vacation by their companies don’t take all of it.  Here are 3 reasons, I decided to commit to it and why I think you should as well.

Reason #1 for Taking More Vacation Days:  Self-care.  You hear this buzz word quite a bit lately.  It’s funny that many people have a hard time taking 30 minutes out of their day for exercise because there’s always some house chore to do that seems to take priority instead.  Or, if you are like me and you own a business, there’s always something you could be doing to manage or grow your business.  However, when you are on vacation, the laundry, the dishes, and your business are far away.  No excuses to relax, get moving, and have fun!

Reason #2 for Taking More Vacation Days:  Make Happy Memories with Your Kids.  I vowed a couple years ago after my best friend died  that I would spend less money on gifts and more time taking vacations with my family.  I don’t think my two teenagers could tell you what they received for Christmas in 2014, maybe not even what they received this past Christmas of 2015!  However, they do remember very vivid details about our trip to Bryson City, North Carolina, three summers ago, where we rented a cabin by a stream and went tubing and white water rafting.  I hope my kids will have an arsenal of happy vacations in their minds and hearts by the time they go to college.

Reason #3 for Taking More Vacation Days:  Defying Fears Around Money.  I stopped working nights and weekends several years ago when I realized that the only reason I did was because I was in fear around money.  I needed to stop telling myself a “lack” story and believe that the money would come without sacrificing my health and my values for family.  Now, nights and weekends are for family.  Period.   

Then, in the past year, in addition to family vacations,  I have donated four weeks of my time to my favorite charity, Send Me On Vacation. I travel out of the country to perform emotional healing and recovery workshops for breast cancer survivors.  By refusing to worry about what missing a month from work would do to my business bottom line, I have gained so much more… including experience in performing workshops abroad, on cruise ships, and the extremely nourishing and WONDERFUL opportunity to make new friends during each week that I have spent on those trips!

Interestingly for me, whenever I come back from a vacation, I have a so much more energy for my business that it seems to act as a catalyst to bring in more income!  

I would love to hear your thoughts about this article.  Thanks in advance for sharing and I hope your summer is filled with laughter, sunlight, time well spent on vacation making many good memories.

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Empowered to Move On: How Hypnosis Can Help You Forget Your "Ex"

“Can you hypnotize me to forget about someone?”  I hear that request more often than you might expect.   The demise of a relationship, even one we know should or must end, can cause severe psychological and emotional stress.  In ancient cultures, there is a core belief that when we suffer an emotional or physical trauma, a part our essence or soul flees the body in order to survive the experience. A shaman or healer would be called in to perform a ritual called “Soul Retrieval” which was considered crucial to the person’s healing process.  As a Hypnotherapist, I understand the value of this philosophy and have had the honor to guide many clients through a modern day version of Soul Retrieval using hypnosis to help them heal emotionally, and move forward.

Here are some real life stories about how Hypnosis has helped my clients to heal after a break-up or divorce.  (The names have been changed for privacy.)

Stories of Betrayal Haunted Him:  Jim had been divorced for two years.  His wife had been the love of his life.  She cheated on him with a best friend and the two went through a very bitter, ugly divorce. The whole experience left him “gun-shy” to date again for fear of getting hurt.  In a very powerful hypnosis session, Jim was able to release the negative emotions from that experience and gain a much needed sense of closure helping him to feel free to move on.

The Ex-Boyfriend Who Haunted Her Dreams:  Carrie had been married for over ten years when she came to get help with recurring dreams about an ex-boyfriend. It had been years since the breakup of her college sweetheart and first love of her life.  Despite time passing and marrying another man, she kept dreaming that she was back at school, desperately trying to find her first love. She would frequently wake up frustrated and sad.  Hypnosis helped her to understand the purpose of her recurring dream, gain some deep inner wisdom and the dreams stopped.

Obsession with the Other Man:  Anne was married to a great guy. She described him as the perfect, loving, husband and father to their three children.  Despite ideal circumstances, she found herself falling in love with another man she had met through work.  Even though she knew it was wrong, she entered into a one night stand with the co-worker followed by a deep and intense emotional affair which they conducted via emails and texting.  Anne knew that this love addiction would destroy her marriage if didn’t stop.  She sought help from a skilled therapist and simultaneously used hypnosis to uncover and clear the unconscious reasons that compelled her obsession.

She Couldn’t Say Goodbye to a Soul Mate:  Susan found herself stuck in a long-term relationship that she knew was unhealthy for her.  Her boyfriend treated her disrespectfully, often criticizing her in public and flirting with other women in her presence.  On several occasions, she had even caught him cheating with other women.  Each time that she would end the relationship, deep feelings of abandonment and grief overwhelmed her and she would end up take her cheating boyfriend back.  In a past life hypnosis session, Sue remembered two previous lives with this man.   In both, they had been husband and wife and circumstances had caused his untimely death which left her feeling devastated and alone.  After hypnosis, Susan felt empowered to end her relationship with this man in this life.

These cases are just a few examples of the after effects caused by the psychological and emotional stress from a painful break-up or divorce.  Here are some common symptoms that can be related to unresolved pain or grief:

• Feeling Emotionally Detached or Numb

• Habitual Replaying of Past Conversations or Memories

• Debilitating Fear of Getting Hurt Again

• Obsession with the Lost Lover

• Grief that Has Not Healed

• Anger that Doesn’t Dissipate or Transfers to Other People in Your Life

• Problems with Forgiveness

• Victim Mentality

• Insomnia or Stressful Dreams Related to the Break-Up

• Headaches and Other Physical Problems

• Post Traumatic Stress

• Manifestation or Worsening of Addictions to Numb Emotional Loss and Pain

• Immune System Deficiencies Caused by PTSD

• Hopelessness or Depression

• Feel Like a Part of You is Dead or Gone

If you are experiencing any of these problems, seek advice from a medical doctor or licensed mental health professional before using a complimentary health modality like hypnosis.
Carolyn Myss, the best-selling author of several books on the subject of the mind-body connection to health and healing believes “the emotional energy we divert focusing on painful memories, or in our efforts to suppress them, is the single most common cause of illness and disease.”

The truth is hypnosis can’t make you forget the one who caused you heartache.  However,  you can use hypnosis and other similar modalities that have the ability to go deeper than logic and act as powerful catalysts to help you heal emotionally and release the addictive thoughts that often plague us after break-up and divorce.
If you resonate with the stories in this article and are interested in getting my help with your own personal healing journey,  apply for a free discovery session with me.

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Women Empowering Women with Cancer

I want to thank you for allowing me to be your partner in your personal development.  You inspire me each and every day, and I'm so grateful to be able to do what I love helping you reach your goals.

I am also so grateful to be coming from Mexico last week where I held another one of my emotional healing workshops that I created called, "The Mermaid's Journey. " This particular one was created specifically for breast cancer survivors! 

I call this work of getting healthy with emotions for all women, a "Mermaid's Journey."  The ocean is a universal symbol of emotions, the sea of emotions.  When you become a mermaid, you become stronger through embracing your emotions and learning to dive through them fearlessly, the good and the stormy ones!

The entire event is funded by the non-profit, SendMeonVacation.org. Their mission is to send breast cancer survivors who have been financially devastated by the cost of treatment on an emotional healing and empowerment vacation. Each survivor receives a photo makeover as a mermaid and an emotional healing workshop experience with me. 

Tammy, a survivor from Boston got her Mermaid Makeover and she looks so happy!

All totaled this past year, I've donated four weeks of my time, traveling around the globe for my favorite cause.  I've been to Bermuda, Boston, Texas, and several areas of Mexico this year all in the name of women's healing and empowerment! 

It is very interesting to see how women from different cultures and different parts of the United States move through the diagnosis, treatment, and emotional aftermath of cancer. 

Bostonian women are strong with a no non-nonsense survivor attitude that says, "Cancer won't defeat me.  I will get through this!" 

Bermudian women are also very strong but attribute their Christian beliefs with their strength, with a survivor attitude that says, "God has a reason and I have faith in God to help me through this."

West coast women from California seem to be more metaphysical believing there is a soul lesson in their journey with cancer. 

I read years ago that a man recently diagnosed with pancreatic cancer sought insight into the "secrets" of cancer survivors.  Were they all doing a certain diet or treatment?  No. They had done different diets, regimens, and treatments.  However, he discovered one common thread: their mental attitude about cancer was the same.  Each had a belief that cancer was to be perceived on the same level as the flu, something to suffer through and get past with a finite end to it.

Below is a photo from the Bermuda survivor cruise where I also performed two half day emotional healing workshops for Bermudian survivors. This is Zazi.  Isn't she beautiful and so happy to have her transformation!

Bermuda cancer survivor and fellow mermaid Zazi.

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